First, I have to leave my husband, which I hate to do. I love just spending time with Scott. I love laughing at/with him. I love being able to hold his hand when we walk. I love giving him a hug before he leaves for work and when he comes home. Coming back to Utah means not being able to do this for another 2 months.
The other reason I really really don't want to leave this time is that when I get back to my mom's house, my dog PJ won't be there to welcome me home. The thing I love most about dogs is how they can't hide their excitement and happiness. I will miss how excited he would get every time I went to my mom's house. His ears would go back, tail would wag, come over to me, wiggle his bum, and try to get as close as possible, often climbing on top of me or pushing me over. His excitement would increase exponentially with how long I was gone. But he won't be there when I get back, and I didn't get to give him one last hug.
A few weeks ago my dog got really sick and after taking him to the vet when he wouldn't stop throwing up, wouldn't eat, and couldn't drink without it coming right back up, we found out that he had acute pancreatitis. He got some anti-nausea meds and antibiotics and started getting better. He perked back up, got his strength back, and we thought he was going to beat this. However, just before I left on vacation he started going back downhill. They were going to try and keep him going a few more days until I got home. He got really bad while I was gone and after talking to the vet, my mom couldn't allow him to suffer any longer. They put him down on Friday.
I will miss him.
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